"ADVERTISE LIKE SHAMELESS WHORES." -- JESSE COX

“The Pin” by STERN Pinball

That $3,000.00 not-quite Transformers pinball machine has been re-branded as “The Pin”… and there was much rejoicing. Actually, more like nonplussed.

I wonder what happened in that meeting they had to have when they were trying to name this machine.

“Hmmm… what do we call this thing?”

“How about ‘The Mini-Stern’?”

“No, nothing we make is ‘mini’. That might send a poor message.”

“How about ‘The Pinball for Noobs’.”

“Nah, too disrespectful to the very market we are going for.”

“We need something short and simple that will alienate as few people as possible.”

“I know! Let’s just call it ‘A Pinball Machine’.”

“No, wait. Let’s call it THE Pinball Machine because the word THE makes it sound special.”

Nope, still too long. OK, Let’s just call it “The Pin.”

“SHIP IT!”

They said “The Pin” so much that it started to get drilled into my head. I could have sworn that I heard those two words even after the video was over. Maybe that was the point.

  • The Pin is a pinball machine.
  • The Pin is the next Big Thing (TM).
  • The Pin will usher in a new era.
  • The Pin weighs half as much.
  • The Pin is not cheap.
  • The Pin is a good conversation piece at parties.
  • The Pin is for all ages.
  • The Pin is always right.
  • I will listen to The Pin.
  • I will not ignore The Pin’s recommendations.
  • The Pin is God.
  • And, if this ever happens again, The Pin will personally rip your lungs out.

Author: SSB

You will find me at a pinball tournament, especially if it's near the east coast, USA. Have more fun! Play more pinball! Support the hobby on twitter by using #pinball. Currently: Attacking Mars. BAO!

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