It’s time for me to get all bloggy-ranty now, so here I go. Hey this is a blog after all.
Anyway, some time ago I visited my sort-of local arcade to practice up on some pinball games. As I was playing The Flintstones, I began to notice a guy, who was near the fighting games with his friends, started to hover around the pinball area. I figured that was a good thing since it’s always nice to get more coin drop in the pinball games. Especially since it’s not league season, and this is an arcade dominated by fighting, dancing, bemani and touch-screen music games.
Soon though, this guy started to hover uncomfortably close to me. Let me be clear that I don’t mind people watching me play. Before long, I’ll ask if you want join a 2-player game. I got the feeling that this guy was not here to play some pinball.
Keep in mind that I was playing The Flintstones, which at the time was the worst pinball game at the arcade. There were quite a few other games there that casual players would think are better just from looking at them. Games like The Addams Family get quarters put in them just from osmosis. None of this guy’s quarters were going into any pinball machines. A short time later, I guess the hovering period had ended, and the crap began.
He said, “dude, do you have fifty cents I can borrow?” Let’s look at that question for a moment.
“Borrow” — So, I’m giving you fifty cents for what? So that you can play ONE game, and then what? You’ll ask for more money like some two-bit gambling addict? Am I supposed to roll up to you later and ask for my fifty cents back? Are you insane?
“fifty cents” — You are in an arcade. This arcade operates on quarters. It isn’t an entertainment center that uses cards. A vast majority of the games cost at least 50 cents per credit. If you are in the arcade and you don’t have 50 cents, the why in the world are you there? Leave the arcade, go get 50 cents (hopefully more), and then come back later.
So I replied, “Yes, I do have fifty cents which I will use to play more pinball games. I don’t have any for you to borrow, because you are not going to pay it back.” Was that a bit “douche-y”? Maybe, but I was annoyed. I had been playing a few of the available games at the arcade, but he asked me this genius-level question while I happened to be playing The Flintstones, which does suck …
He said “Huh?” Of course he said that. So I repeated what I said, while I attempted to shoot Jackpots and bounced balls of drop targets to get Supers. He came back with the following gem. I kid you not, this is exactly what he said.
“I’ve got a hundred-dollar bill.”
I explained to him how he could go out and buy something with that hundred dollars. Then with the change he received, he might be able to get the fifty cents that he needed to come back and continue playing. I realize that is approaching Massengill-level douchiness, but I didn’t care. I just wanted to finish all of the bowling frames on the game so I could get my initials on something before I left.
I wasn’t too worried about getting into an altercation. I was in a safe area that is not even 200 feet away from a police station. He left me alone after that, and I did happen to finish bowling those high-risk frames on The Flintstones.
I have no clean way to end this, so I’ll just say this post is in honor of the following parody card: